"it" just moved
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
