My balls are so social today.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Randomize
