I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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