There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
