Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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