On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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