Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I feel like abortions should bother me more
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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