so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
