Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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