my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
