My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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