VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
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