people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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