Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Shame - the story of my life.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
