Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize