And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
