How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
