these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
