he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
BRING THE BAGELS
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
