WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
