Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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