just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
