I'm lost and stupid without you.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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