I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
