This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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