I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
