Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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