and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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