Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
