We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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