hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
