he shaved USA in his pubs
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
