So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Do you remember whose house we're in?
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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