It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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