Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Randomize
