id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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