how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
