its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
