Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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