so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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