I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
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