so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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