She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
