Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
