enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
