no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
