Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
