I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
i drank out of a bidet.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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