Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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