My brain says no but my pants say off.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
